God Works

Yes, He does. In the most mysterious ways. I was in dire need of a push. I needed someone to tell me I wasn’t hitting a plateau, because it sure felt like it.

I had an entire weekend planned out. Go to work, watch some shows, catch up with friends, and be absolutely distracted. “Nope”, the universe said, “You’re not doing that.”

Oddly enough, God wanted me to sit my ass down and just LISTEN for once. How do you get me to cancel all my plans? Cue in the stomach flu. I spent the last few days at home stuck in bed with only my thoughts and an aching stomach to listen to. Of course, I had about a thousand things spiraling through my head at once – mostly negative things. I found myself questioning my priorities, my choices, my talent, and my passions.

Fast forward a little bit. After laying in bed contemplating life and binge-watching Queer Eye on Netflix for a day, I finally had some energy to get stuff done. I ended up having to make a quick trip to church to pick up a music book.

As I walk into the church, I notice it’s empty. My body all of a sudden gravitates to one of the pews and says, “SIT DOWN.” And in that moment something happened. I needed to pray. I needed to actually talk to God about what’s been going on in my head. I pick up one of the books in the pews and turn the page to that day’s gospel reading and reflection. The irony had me sitting there with chills.

So God, you gave me this far-from-delightful stomach virus to have my weekend revolve around this very moment? I was amazed. Everything I needed to hear all weekend was on that one page. Had I gone one day before, or two days before to pick up that book I would have missed this entire moment.

In the end I didn’t need someone to reassure me that I wasn’t a talentless human being – that was just me having low self-esteem and not believing in myself. I needed someone to tell me to “brush off” the resentment, regrets, and negativity that I have for myself. I needed to remember to trust in Jesus’ timing, not my own.

I promise I’m not contagious anymore an I don’t have the plague. Hugs are much needed. I’ll see you around.

 

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